Somewhere out there on Earth, there’s a spot that will tell me absolutely everything I need to know about this long insane game we call life. I though it was on 88th street and Roosevelt avenue, where I would walk to school hearing Salsa play on 82nd street and Bachata on northern blvd.
Where the grocery store had the sickest Ice cream and the tiny little ninjas I would buy with the 50 cents I ‘found’ in my mothers purse. Where I would walk to school with two other good friends, thinking we would be bff for the long run.
It was my fault that didn’t last.
I though it was in the building I grew up in, playing stupid games with me, my brother, my cousin and the neighbors across our apartment door. We though it was haunted. we got scared a few times.
Later I thought it was in the Dominican Republic. Where the people were amazing and dangerous as hell. Where I would hear stories of poverty yet the spirit in them was stronger than anything I’ve ever experience. Where they made the best of a situation, they laughed, cried, they lived. The beaches were magnificent even if a hurricane had just come through. The restaurants were amazing. I was completely okay carrying an extra 20 pounds in my belly. . I didn’t find the answer, but I found a clue… Wisdom.
Then I thought I would find it in Ecuador. Stunning sights, incredible people, and the loneliest I’ve ever felt. Something was missing. I couldn’t figure out what. I just knew that something was missing on that trip. I did make the best of it. I fucking ate, I walked around beautiful architectural sights, saw people sing, play instruments, people dance to Michael Jackson tunes I had blast.
I thought I would find the answer when I came home. It felt unreal. I was standing in front of my house looking at it and thinking, it’s so small. I laughed. It was small. Then I knew I was onto something. I went on to finish college, and went to work and haven’t traveled since. I FUCKING miss it. although I am happy where I am now. Thor is sleeping on the couch, Lera is preparing for magnificent things in her acting career and I have this chance to write, to speak, to tell my little that I’ll read later on in life and laugh. Maybe others here might read this post as well, maybe they’ll get something out of it… or hate it.
I’m starting to think I’ll never find the answer to life.
Yet the more I live, and the more I learn, I feel like I’m 1 step closer while taking 5 steps backwards. That’s how funny life is. Once you think you have it figured out, a whole new journey unravels in front of your eyes and all you can do is laugh and prepare yourself for whats about to come.