Every morning bright and early, the whimper of a dog who must PEE is heard. He’ll slowly climb up the bed and stick his nose right in your face. You toss and turn and find refuge underneath your covers but he finds a way, and like a horror film you’ll turn on a flashlight underneath your covers and his face you’ll see and by that point it’ll be too late. You’ll pull away the covers and as if it was like magic you’ll find yourself outside with him peeing on the grass looking straight into your eyes as you try to figure out how in the hell you got outside so quickly.
He must be a wizard. How else would you explain it?